Comical (But Familiar) Vintage Lingerie Complaints (History Of The Padded Girdle)

In The Coshocton Tribune, July 1, 1958, an unhappy response to Frederick’s padded girdle creation

Writer Is Aghast At Latest “Form Deception” Example
, by Doc Quigg

Every femme is entitled to pine for a form fatal, but the latest strange device for magnifying the womanly shape is, honestly, just too much.

It was Henry Wadsworth Longfellow who remarked poetically that “things are not what they seem.” He can say that again. Female fashion is becoming a well-rounded falsehood.

Things are getting so bad that you can’t look at a lady without wondering whether she is throwing you a foam-rubber curve. What blasted off these remarks was a package waiting for me on my desk when I returned from vacation. It contained the aforementioned strange device.

With it was a notation that this might be something worth writing about. Well, sure it is. Also worth philosophizing about.

What the thing seems to be is a modern, built-in bustle, worn at foundation level. The note with it described it as “the panty girdle with derriere pads.” It has two beautifully rounded, tapered, inch-thick foam-rubber pads sewn into the seat.

To a man looking at this monstrosity, the idea occurs that it is a magnificent triumph of functional contradiction. What is a girdle for? To shrink what it is girdling, that’s what. Now here is an elasticized panty girdle, admirably built to squeeze the area it covers, but contradicting itself by padding out part of what it is trying to belittle.

And speaking of contradictions, here we have millions of women on strict diets, trying to slough off pounds in obvious places. And along comes this Frederick’s of Hollywood with his padded panties to simulate the lost poundage.

Subject For Interviews

Becoming interested in the new development, a local newspaper, the Daily News, devoted its inquiring – photographer column to interviews on the question: “What is your opinion of a girl who resorts to false padding in the rear?”

The first answer, from a lady named Anne Viviani Frisbie, was: “Since I’ve always been ample in that department, I’m enthralled at the idea that there are girls who actually resort to this subterfuge. Feminine figures are becoming more mysterious with the new fashions. How do you men tell fact from fiction these days?”

There is the temptation to say that any girl who wears one of the new things should be turned over the knee for a good spanking. But what good would that do? With an inch of rubber padding, she wouldn’t even feed it. Probably the only thing we males can do is retaliate — let’s bring back the zoot suit with the brawny — but false — shoulders.

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