I’ve Never Given Her Lingerie Before… How Do I Start?

Giving lingerie is more a matter of when to start than how to start. If you don’t know her well enough to have either seen her lingerie (her in it is even better), know her lingerie size (or be able to sneak a look at the tags), now isn’t likely the time. As Gracie wrote:

There’s a reason why lingerie is often called Intimate Apparel: It’s not just the proximity of the apparel to the skin it’s on, but it defines the relationship between the gift giver & the gift receiver as well.

(I couldn’t say it any better myself!)

But let’s say that you have seen her in — and personally helped her out of — her lingerie. How do you begin giving her loving and lusty gifts of lingerie?

Carefully, my friend, very carefully.

Lingerie can be a loaded gift.

It’s loaded with your expectations, and her fears. You expect her to be thrilled that you adore her so, but she’s afraid you expect her to look like or act like some porn star. (Those are two concerns: how she’s supposed to look and how she’s supposed to act.)

Conversely, it’s also loaded with her expectations and your fears.

She expects that if you’re so bold as to buy her little bits of nylon and lace, that you’ll know her size; that if you’re giving her strappy elastic bits with silk bows, that you’ll know her style — both in terms of personal taste and what physically compliments her. You’re terrified that you really don’t know any of that. Or that she’ll take the gift the wrong way — any way but which you gave it.

And so begins Slip’s lingerie gift giving advice for the holiday season.

I’ll be publicly answering your questions and dispensing advice on lingerie gift giving. I’ve got a few emailed questions to get to, but meanwhile, feel free to email me your questions and I’ll do my best to get to them here in plenty of time for you to do your holiday shopping.

Be sure to note if and how you’d like to be credited (I’m happy to just say it was a question asked and have no name, if that’s your wish too) — but I will be replying with public posts, so be clear on that bit of info. Thanks. :)

Also, if you really, really have need for a personal shopper, let me know. I did that last year for a handful of folks — at a reasonable fee. Contact me if you have a need for that.

Image of Jessica via George Sparks’ George’s Girls.

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